Well, I made to Washington DC and back. It was a long, hard trip for all of us.

We left here on Tuesday evening at about 5:00pm central time. We made it to DC by 8:00am the next morning. We stopped for breakfast at Bob Evans, but Josh did not like it. He has a hard time finding food in America that he likes. I did not completely comprehend that until now. We thought it would be fun to take him into DC and let him some new sites. Well... he got to see all of about TWO HOURS of traffic; and we never even went more than 10 miles per hour. I could never move back to a big city! Or I should say, "Please, Lord, don't move me to a big city?!?!" I have learned not to tell GOD what I will not do. My life seems to be much easier that way. We then decided to try to locate the airport so we knew where to go. I was not sure we would ever find it. But after about an hour and asking a few people we did make it there. It is a good thing that we are women or we might still be driving around!! :-) HeHeHe! After finding where we needed to go, we went to Kmart, got gas, and then back to the airport to park and take a much-needed nap.

The plane was a little late; and that makes for more nerves. I was so ready to finally see and meet her. Over the last several months, I have built a relationship with her in my mind, but in reality, she knows hardly anything about me. She had a few letters and a couple of pictures, but Grandma had seen them. I am not sure what Grandma possibly said to her about them. Alyona may have been thinking, "This can't be good. Grandma is going to be mad." Once we hugged a few times, though, she was fine. During our wait time, Josh ran into a few people he knew from his former orphanage in Odessa. There was one girl he used to beat up. He was able to apologize to her, so that alone was worth bringing him. He got addresses of few people who have been adopted and now live in the States. We spent a little while visiting with people in the airport. Once the children came off the plane, Josh helped some other families talk to their children. He is such a sweet young man and so good with kids. I could see him being called into some kind of youth ministry. While waiting for our paperwork to come in, Alyona needed to use the bathroom. Well, I never thought to tell her about the automatic flush toilets. She sat down and, poor thing, the toilet flushed all by itself! It was sucking her in!!! Her eyes were huge, like, "Why did I need to use this thing?" But I was able to "save" her before she was sucked out to sea!

After we got her picked up, we went to spend the night with Vicky's brother, Brian, and his family. They live about five miles from the airport, but we were driving on the Interstate at 6:00pm so guess what, we got stuck in traffic again. We did make it there in time to have dinner with them. Brian's wife, Reco, made chicken, salmon, and pasta in a red sauce. It was very good, but Alyona would not eat anything. After dinner, we went to take our bath, but I am not sure she has ever been in a bathtub before. She seemed to like it. I do not think I could have gotten into that water it, though. It was just lukewarm, if not more cold, but it was the way she wanted it. She told Josh they only shower ONE time per week, so getting her to shower every day while here has been strange to her, but she does seem to be liking it. After her bath, she was able to play with Brian's kids. It did not seem to matter they did not speak the same language. They just made it work. I opened up some raisins when we went downstairs to go to bed. Each time I ate a couple she would also have some. At least I got something down her. Thank you, Jesus, for the small favors.

We all slept hard that night, but had to be awake by 4:00am to leave for home. I wonder what was going through her head. It was a hard trip home for her. We had hardly gone about forty-five minutes when she got sick the first of many times. We moved her to the front seat and that helped. At least it did until we gave her the PC to watch a DVD, then she got sick again. We were somewhat worried because she would not eat or drink anything the rest of the way home. We did make it home... after EIGHTEEN LONG HOURS. The GPS got us to DC the shortest way, but for some reason it did not bring us home the same direction. We missed a turn, or did something else wrong. By the way, did I say it was the LONGEST eighteen-hour trip I think I have ever been on? We did finally make it here. When we unloaded the car, Alyona took my stuff into her room and unpacked it into hers drawers. I do not think she understood that we were home and I would sleep with Tim. Her face lit up when we took her into her room. She went straight to the Christmas tree to check it out. I was so glad she liked it. Then, it was time for bed, as I had to work on Friday.

Christopher and Tim stayed home Friday morning to sit with Alyona while I went to work. It was good for all three of them to get to play together and just have fun. My parents came over to see her while I was working. I wish I could have been there, but I needed to be an adult and go earn some money! They called and said she was the best. I am so glad they immediately fell in love with her as much as we already do. After I got home, we needed to run some errands. She was not too happy about getting back in the car again. Once we were buying her some things, though, she became OK with it. At one point, we did have to call Vicky to have Josh translate. They decided it would be easier to actually come to the store. We finally made it through the store. I let her pick out a little knitting machine. WOW! I don't know how you would do this if you didn't have people around to help you. THANK YOU, Josh and Vicky. =) We went to Walmart; and she helped pick out some things to eat, but some of them she apparently doesn't like, or should I say she now won't even try. After that, we all went to dinner at Ryan's. There were thirteen of us; and it was too much for her to handle. We had hoped that being a buffet bar she would find something to eat, but no such luck. She was not going to put anything in her mouth. After dinner, we went to Sam's Club to pick up a few things. She and Justin seemed to have a great time playing around. I was glad for that as he does not have much more time before he leaves for Minnesota. =(

We had a nice morning Saturday. Alyona was up early, very early. I heard a noise in the kitchen at 4:30am. When I walked in there, she was going through my pots & pans and organizing them. Later, Tim and her went through all the desk drawers throughout the house to see which pens worked and which didn't. We then ate breakfast. She had TWO bowls of cereal, a pear, a banana, and then she saw me make eggs and wanted to have "just one". Yes, she knew what "one" was. At dinner she would not try the chicken nor the potatoes that she had picked out while we were at the store. We had another girl, who had been adopted from the same orphanage Alyona lives in, come over and spend the night. She was adopted two years ago this February. We took both of them to Canton to see the Christmas lights. They had so much fun riding on the carousel ride. I made hot chocolate when we got home. Alyona she was so tired she had gone in to her room, put on her pajamas OVER HER CLOTHES, and climbed in bed! WOW! And she did not even have to be told to.

Sunday was a busy, busy day. We started at church. The girls went to our 8:00 am Sunday school class with us, then to their 9:30 class, then on to K.I.D.S. church at 11:00. They seemed to have a good time together. After church, we went to my mom and dad's house. I wanted Alyona to feel comfortable with them as they were going to watch her a few days over the next couple of weeks while I work. As it turned out Anastasia went with her. My mom made cookies with them, they watched TV, went for a tractor ride with my dad, ate cookies. They had so much fun they both want to go back. That is so great. Today my dad called me to say he was mad at me. When I asked him why he said because I did not work and the girls were not at their house.

Alyona and I ran some errands today and went shopping again. Then we went in to Jackson to see Tim and go to lunch with him. We also stopped at his corporate office to drop off some keys, but more importantly to show her off. Then, we went back to his building to show her off some more! When we came home this afternoon, we made six cakes to deliver tomorrow. Alyona was funny watching me make the cakes. I use a cake mix and a diet Sprite. When you pour in the Sprite it foams up a lot. She got such a kick out of that!

Some of the things she likes to do...
1) Ride bike
2) Play on the Wii. She is good at boxing and bowling.
Watch out you kids at the orphanage!
3) Shop and organize the shelves of the store, and my cart
4) Eat fruit, lots of it

Food is not going so well. She could eat her weight in fruit and French fries. But we cannot get meat down her. She does like pasta, too. I guess she is eating more than she would if she was at the orphanage. It is just hard to see her not eat a well-balanced meal. From the sound of it they pretty much only get a broth with a little vegetable in it and a piece of bread and peanuts. We will work on balance more once the English gets better.

I came across the following Christmas story a couple weeks ago:

Will the Christ Child Come?
Written by Gaye Willis

One Christmas we had an interesting experience that I would like to share. Halfway through December we were doing the regular evening things when there was a knock at the door. We opened it to find a small package with a beautiful ceramic lamb inside. We looked at the calendar and realized that the 12 days of Christmas were beginning! We waited excitedly for the next night's surprise and only then, with the gift of a matching shepherd, did we realize that the lamb was part of a nativity set.

Each night we grew more excited to see what piece we would receive. Each was exquisitely beautiful. The kids kept trying to catch the givers as we slowly built the scene at the manger and began to focus on Christ's birth.

On Christmas Eve, all the pieces were in place, all but the Baby Jesus. My 12-year-old son really wanted to catch our benefactors and began to devise all kinds of ways to trap them. He ate dinner in the minivan, watching and waiting, but no one came. Finally, we called him in to go through our family's Christmas Eve traditions. But before the kids went to bed, we checked the front step - - no Baby Jesus! We began to worry that my son had scared them off. My husband suggested that maybe they dropped the Jesus and there wouldn't be anything coming. Somehow, something was missing that Christmas Eve.

There was a feeling that things weren't complete. The kids went to bed and before I went to bed, I again checked to see if the Jesus had come - - no, the doorstep was empty... In our family, the kids can open their stockings when they want to, but they have to wait to open any presents until Dad wakes up. So one by one they woke up very early and I also woke up to watch them. Even before they opened their stockings, each child checked to see if perhaps during the night the Baby Jesus had come.

Missing that piece of the set seemed to have an odd effect. At least it changed my focus. I knew there were presents under the tree for me and I was excited to watch the children open their gifts, but first on my mind was the feeling of waiting for the ceramic Christ Child. We had opened just about all of the presents when one of the children found one more for me buried deep beneath the limbs of the tree.

He handed me a small package from my former visiting teaching companion. This woman was somewhat less-active in the church. I had been her visiting teacher for a couple of years and then, when she was asked to be a visiting teacher, she requested to go with me. I had learned over time they didn't have much for Christmas, so that their focus was on the children. It sounded like she didn't get many gifts to open, so I had always given her a small package -- new dish towels, the next year's Relief Society lesson manual -- not much, but something for her to open.

I was touched when at church on the day before Christmas, she had given me this small package, saying it was just a token of her love and appreciation. Then, on Christmas morning, as I took off the bow, I remembered my friendship with her and was filled with gratitude for knowing her and for her kindness and sacrifice in this giving me a gift. But as the paper fell away, I began to tremble and cry. There in the small brown box was the Baby Jesus! He had come!

I realized on that Christmas Day, that Christ will come into our lives in ways that we don't expect. The spirit of Christ comes into our hearts as we serve one another. We had waited and watched for Him to come, expecting the dramatic "knock at the door and scurrying of feet" but He came in a small, simple package that represented service, friendship, gratitude and love.

This experience taught me that the beginning of the true spirit of Christmas comes as we open our hearts and actively focus on the Savior. But we will most likely find Him in the small and simple acts of love, friendship and service that we give to each other. This Christmas I want to feel again the joy of knowing that Christ is in our home. I want to focus on loving and serving. More than that, I want to open
my heart to Him all year that I may see Him again.

"She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins." -- Matthew 1:21 NIV

I hope you enjoyed this story as much as I did. I think we may do this next year with our girls and a few other families. I want to teach the Kristina & Alyona that Christmas is about the birth of Christ, not all the gifts.

I hope you all have a Merry Christmas!!

Lynn

Boy, this has been one of those weeks... up and down, up and down, up and down, and then up and down another time. You get the picture! LOL! We have had a few a late nights recently discussing the adoption. As much as I'm tired of talking about it... It is all I can do. It's all WE can do. So, I go from wanting to talk about it... to it being the last thing I want to talk about... all in less than a minute. As I had mentioned in a previous post, it really is a roller coaster ride.

We have several people who have been following our blog (and thank you please post some comments so we know you are there) and I received a call from one of them on Monday. I was working so I did not take the time right away to answer it, but then I missed a very important call from the church so I stopped to listen to my voicemail. The lady on the voicemail was frantic. I needed to call her right away. She had seen Alyona's picture out on a website for her to be hosted by family in America over the winter holiday. She said they needed to talk to us right away so we could possibly get her. Well, I will just tell you... we went right to work on that; and within a very short time we had everything done. =) I will be driving to Washington, DC on Tuesday evening to pick her on Wednesday afternoon!! I sure do hope the plane is not late. I have my best friend in the whole world going with me (next to my husband, of course, who could not go as he will be out of town working). We are also bringing her son, who is from Ukraine, so he is very happy to have someone to speak Russian to. And I am as happy to have someone who speaks Russian to her for me! At least until we get used to each other, that is. So we will get to spend Christmas and New Year's Day with her. Everything is almost as perfect as it could get, other than Kristina not being here.

Then, on Tuesday, we learned grandma has started the process in Russia of attempting to get guardianship of the girls. Tim came home from work and he was so depressed it was not even funny. However, this time I had a peace about it all. I am still worried Satan may come in and try to do something, but my GOD is bigger than he is, and has already defeated him, so we just keep moving forward. We were at a Christmas party Friday night and our translator called on Tim's cell phone. It was 4:30 am in Ukraine!! He wanted to tell us some encouraging news. He said we could call the hosting agency as they have some new photos of Kristina. Also, he spoke to the orphanage director at Kiliya; and they will try to arrange for the girls to Skype with each other while Alyona is here. It has been more than two years since they have seen or talked to each other. Please pray that this will work out for them.

About two weeks ago, I was given some money from a friend to go buy a Christmas tree for the girls' room, so I got a PINK tree and ornaments that match the color of their room. I think it has grown on Tim a little... hehehe!! But it is not about him it is for the girls. I came right home and put it up. I just felt like it was something I was to do. It looks very nice in their room. A quick side note: Tim has done a great job in their room, from a new ceiling and ceiling fan, to fresh paint, and hardwood floors, and curtains. We have ordered their furniture and are waiting for it to come in. For now the mattress is on the floor, but it looks great. I will try to get some pictures posted as soon as the furniture is put in.

While at church tonight I was talking to a friend and telling her all that has happened. She was amazed. Me, too!! =0 She told me a story about a Sunday school lesson someone taught her years ago, about "expecting faith". At the time she had been very, very tight on money. She was not even sure if she would have any gifts to put under the tree that year for her children. After the class, though, she went out and spent $2 on gift wrapping paper and then told God He needed to help with the presents. Well, guess what? HE DID. She said I had put up the pink tree expecting them to be here, and, see, one of them will be. Another friend told me she was looking back at some emails her and I had exchanged; and she said about two weeks ago I went to saying "she" instead of "they". I had not even realized it. I guess it was God preparing me for the one girl for now. And that is OK. Two would have been better, but I am sure not going to tell God, "No, I want both or none."

I am asked all the time if I think about my daughters-to be-every day. HA! Do I think about them? I eat, sleep, and dream THEM! As much as I'd love to not think about another adoption thing ever again... I CAN'T and DON'T want to stop thinking about them. They are my daughters!!! Would I stop believing in God because I can't see him? NO!!!! I will not stop thinking of them... because I KNOW I will have them in my arms one day, just as I will be able to spend my days in the presence of my heavenly Father one day, too!

I have been married for twenty-six years. He is the man of my dreams. I have two of the most incredible boys, and now two girls on the other side of the world praying their “mama” won't stop fighting for them. Do I believe that God will bring our daughters home? Yes, in His timing! No, I won't stop fighting for this adoption, even when weeks like this I get really tired of it. Weeks like this I want to throw in the towel... though I never would. It's weeks like this, that I lay everything at God's feet and tell him I trust Him with each of our daughters' life and our adoption plans... because there is no one else Who is bigger, greater and more loving than He. I try to recognize Who really is in control of this adoption, but at times I want to help Him. If I would just step back, and let Him do it, it will work out for the best. I can do nothing. I KNOW without a doubt the day we meet our daughters will be a day when I will see that every day of this adoption journey will have been worth it.

It's like an eternal pregnancy that will never end. God made pregnancy nine months for a reason, but I know in my heart, that I will carry on another year of this if we have to. I just hope and pray we don't. I will keep dreaming about them. I will keep fighting for them. I will keep loving them... until they are in our arms, or God says it is time for us to move on. I can tell you that I wouldn't survive this long, mountainous, strenuous climb to our girls if it wasn't for my relationship with Jesus and my husband. I need Him to help me through. I want to smile as I go along this journey to them, but there are days that I cry a lot. I want to enjoy the amazing life God has mapped out for us. I want to love the plan God has for my life, even if it should be waiting for 1+ years for our girls. And, when things get tough, I'm thankful for a loving, caring, and sympathetic God that I know will wrap His arms around me and carry me to the end. We would never have met so many of you, if we didn't take this journey. And most importantly I have a rock solid relationship with Jesus because of this amazing journey. I would never have thought I could grow this close to God.

So, it's on these roller coaster days that I am reminded what an amazing life I have been blessed with! With so many surrounding us, supporting us, and praying us through. And, to be thankful every day for the small things. I just hope and pray that along this ride with us it will touch your heart to help the orphans of this world. Just ask God to show you what He would have you do; and He will, but please be willing to do it. My prayer for all of you is that you will be willing to be made willing to do His work, whatever that maybe.

Sorry for the long-winded post... I can hardly ever write something from the heart that only takes a few lines. :-)

Lynn

I hope this post finds you all well. And I trust you all had a great Thanksgiving. My family had the pleasure of spending the week with my sister from Illinois. I truly was blessed by our time together. I so wished she lived closer to us.

We decided not to submit our paperwork to the Ukraine government for an appointment for this year, as the girls will not be eligible for adoption until the end of January, or the first part of February. It was sad to see the holidays come and know the girls will not be here, but I am clinging to the fact that they WILL be here next year. I went yesterday, bought a pink Christmas tree, and decorated it. I have set it up in their room. It looks so cute! We have made some progress in their room, too. It is now painted, and the new ceiling is in, the hardwood floors are done. All we have left is the crown molding and baseboards. Then, it will be time to load in. Yeah!! I went on black Friday and bought a desk for them. It will be so pretty when it is finished. I cannot wait for them to come and see it.

My youngest son got up and went shopping with me on black Friday. We had a good time together. We spent about NINE hours shopping, and then his friends called and asked him to meet them at the mall. For a kid who hates shopping he had a very long day in the stores! I got the rest of my shopping done. Yeah!

When I was at the gym this morning I was watching the TV show Reba. I was listening to the theme song and it made me think about how hard it is for TWO parents to raise kids these days, and that show is about a single parent. I am not sure how they find the time to do everything and pay for everything the kids need and want. Then, to think about the girls’ grandma, at her age, trying to raise two young girls terrifies me. So many questions and so few answers. I just want what is best for them. If God says that it is for them to stay there and someday go to live with their grandma, then I will have to come to grips with that. It will not be easy, but we must move on; and God will show us who is to be "our girls".

Our oldest son is still set on moving to Minnesota in January. I have mixed emotions on the subject. I am trying to be happy for him, but it is hard to see him go so far away. I wish he were staying nearby so he could get to know the girls. I am also worried about the fact that he has no idea how to drive in the snow. In addition, I wish he was going and had a job to start as soon as he gets there. Plus, he does not even own winter clothes! But he is 26 years old; and he will make it. It is hard to be a mom. I can't even comprehend how God must feel with all of us down here not doing what He desires for each of us to do.

I got a Christmas letter from a friend today who started out talking about a Christmas remembered. How she believed in Santa, but when she went to school her friends were telling her there was no Santa. When she turned 13 she informed her parents that she no longer believed. Her mother told her that was fine, then there would no longer be presents under the tree that day; and she woke up on Christmas morning to no gifts. Her mother told her they had no money to buy anything except a blue chenille housecoat. It was not at all what the girl wanted, but her mother told her about Jesus, and that He is the greatest gift of all. He was born to be our Savior and that as long as she placed her faith in Him she would go to heaven to spend eternity with Him and her loved ones. She went on to say that was one of the best gifts she had ever received.

Well, I will close for now. Remember to share your faith everyday with someone. He is the reason for the season.

Lynn

I am feeling a little overwhelmed at this moment. I was so sure I had heard God say the girls would be here for Christmas, and I now know they will not. I am trying to praise Him in this storm, but it is not always easy to do so. We have so many uncertainties right now. The good news is Alyona is home from the hospital. We still have not been able to locate grandma. We thought Alyona knew how to contact her, but that apparently we had received incorrect information. Or maybe she could be afraid to tell, as she does not want to get into trouble with her grandma. I have to remind myself she is only nine years old. I am just so thankful the director at the orphanage had a caregiver go to stay at the hospital with her so that she was not alone. Thank you, Jesus, for letting her have that compassion on Alyona.

There is a song I love by Sarah Groves titled Generations. It says, "Lord, remind me of this, with every decision I make generations will reap what I sow. I can pass on a curse or a blessing to those I will never know." Later, it continues, "To my great, great, great grand-daughter, live in peace. To my great, great, great grand-son, live in peace." This text so needs to become my prayer, that in all of this God is using me to help with the next generation. No matter who it is He ultimately has come to live with us, we must live & act in a manner which brings glory to His name.

Tim redistributes some email devotionals to numerous people; and the following is one he recently forwarded:

Then Abraham breathed his last and died in a good old age, an old man and full of years, and was gathered to his people. And it came to pass, after the death of Abraham, that God blessed his son Isaac. And Isaac dwelt at Beer Lahai Roi. -- Genesis 25:8, 11

Pass It On

A man's character often lives on long after he is gone. Take Jonathan Edwards, for example. He loved the Lord and taught his children to do the same. According to one estimate, he has had 929 descendants. Of these, 430 were ministers; 86 were university professors; 13 became university presidents; 75 authored good books; and 7 were elected to the United States Congress. One was vice president of his nation. Edwards left a spiritual heritage that became a blessing not only for his descendants, but for all of society.

Abraham did the same. At the age of 175 he was "gathered to his people." But that wasn’t the end. Abraham passed on to his son a spiritual heritage that brought God's blessing upon Isaac and, down through the centuries, to all of us through Jesus Christ, a distant descendant of this godly patriarch. Abraham didn't merely "pass on"; he made it possible for God to pass on His blessings through his descendants.

We all need to live with future generations in mind. It's not enough to live a godly life to gain God's blessings for yourself; consider what influence your life will have on your grandchildren, your great-grandchildren and the rest of your family tree. The character you choose to develop will leave its mark on the lives of generations you'll never live to see.

Don't be content to leave an inheritance of material possessions. Instead, strive to be a channel for God's blessings to reach generations still unborn. The greatest inheritance your posterity can receive from you is the heritage of God's blessing.

Live so your descendants will rise up and call you blessed.

=====

Oles is traveling to Kiliya to visit Kristina this weekend. Tim spoke with him on Skype the other day. (I sometimes feel they speak more than we do now a days! LOL!) Oles is going to check on her and ask if she would like to be adopted. Both of the girls need to want that for this to work out. I just hope and pray God will be working a miracle there, but if not, then maybe this is His way of closing that door. I feel all tore up inside just waiting to hear what she has to say. I have asked God to show me a clear picture of what we are to do. If she says, no, then I guess He is closing that chapter of the book. We will then make our plans to find the girls He wants us to have. Will it be easy? NO, NO, NO. Will it hurt? YES! It will be like losing one of my own kids. Will I go on? Yes! But I know God is my comforter. He will not leave me in any of this. If for some reason, later, the girls would need us, and Tim would be willing, I would go and bring them home. I just want to seek God in all of this. I have grown so much in all of this. It amazes me.

I went the other day to the IRS and picked up the paperwork to fill out to establish a 501(c)(3) as we work to start a new ministry. It will be one to help other people who are adopting. I am not sure of all the details, but I know God has put it on my heart. I just want as many kids to have a home as possibly can. Every child needs and deserves the love of a family. One who can show God's love for them. I ran into a lady in the store the other day; and she was telling me how her and her husband did not think they could have children. I felt so bad for her. I could tell she really wanted them, but for some reason could not have any. I asked her if they had ever thought about adopting; and she said, no. She wanted her own biological children for her and her husband to love. I told her I had two wonderful boys who came into this world through me, but through this adoption process I have learned children do not need to come out of us for us to love them. My heart is overwhelmed by how much I love Kristina & Alyona and so far they have only been photos to us. At the end of our conversation, I gave her my number and told her to call me if she ever needed to talk. I hope she can find it in her heart to love one of the children who needs a home right now. We are all adopted by JESUS. I guess it was good thing He did not have to give birth to each of us for Him to love us.

Lynn

I am sorry it has taken me a while to get back to this. I set out every day to work on another post, then get sidetracked. I also have had a few weeks of not feeling well, but hopefully I am over that now!

To start out, I want to thank everyone for your prayers the last few months. I know we could not go through all of this if it were not for God, and the prayers of our friends.

After finding out about the grandmother, I walked around in total shock for probably two weeks. I was having a major pity party inside. I was a little mad at God, too. I felt like how could He give us this promise about the girls and then rip them away. But I want you to know that we serve a GREAT and MIGHTY GOD! He has taken me on such a journey over the last few weeks that if I told it all most would think I was writing a book.

One week after we learned of the grandmother, Tim met me at the top of the stairs at our church on a Thursday night and said we needed to talk before class. He said he had spoke to our friend in Ukraine earlier that day; and he had some bad news. Alyona had been admitted to the hospital with a very high fever, possibly due to some sort of bad infection. Of course my momma bear side kicked in and I intended to go home to buy an airline ticket as soon as class was over. Somehow, some way I wanted to be there with her. Then the brain kicked in and reminded me that if I went I quite probably could not be with her anyway, as I was not family. Not family?!?! She is growing inside of my heart and no matter what the grandmother wants that is not going to stop! Then, on Friday, I spoke to a friend here in the states who is from Russia; and she informed of how the hospitals over there work. WOW! It is not good. I hope we never get to that kind of health care system here in the U.S. When you are in the hospital there you almost need someone with you 24 hours a day. They supposedly do not have orderlies to bring you food or drinks. And to get your medicines your family member must leave the hospital to go get your prescriptions at an external pharmacy, then bring them back for a nurse to give to you. Well, consider that Alyona is an orphan, and the grandmother does not live near her. How is Alyona ever going to get well? But God is in control. Right? Right!!!

You see when we first found out about the girls we thought there was no family. Then, there was a grandmother and an uncle. The grandmother lived in Russia; and we believed both parents had died 4 1/2 years ago. We were thinking, why had the grandmother just left the girls in orphanages? If she really loves them she should come and get them. Well, we are now getting more of the story. It sounds like only one of the parents had passed away back then and the other parent possibly could not afford to care for the girls, so they had to go to the orphanage at that time. From what we've been told, the other parent died last winter. Now the girls have to be entered in the national orphan registration system for a full year before they are eligible or international adoption. I guess the government is hoping the parent will come back to life?!?! Who knows? Anyway, we have now found out that the grandmother has temporarily relocated to Odessa, to be closer to the girls. Well, that did make me feel a little better. I guess... but then she will be more involved with them, too. That will make this all the harder. Well, after Alyona getting sick, and me talking to my friend about the medical care over there, I prayed about what we should do. I then told Tim that I felt we needed to locate the grandmother and offer her the funds to go be with Alyona. I think our friend over there thinks we are crazy!! I just want to show the grandmother Jesus' love. When we asked him to try and find where the grandmother was living, and to go visit her, and offer her some of our money to go be with Alyona, I am sure he had to be thinking, "You Americans are nuts!!! She sends you this mean letter; and you want to help her!!" Well it was not so much to help her as much as it was about someone, anyone, being there with Alyona. I cannot imagine how afraid she must be. Well, we have not been able to find the grandmother. We have tried in Odessa, and in Russia. As of now we are not sure of how Alyona is, or if she has been taken back to the orphanage, or if she is still in the hospital; and not knowing is soooo hard! Any news would be welcome, but maybe this is God's way of making sure I am relying on Him daily.

A week ago tonight my oldest son gave me some heartbreaking news. He informed Tim & I that he is planning on moving to Minnesota after Christmas, as he wants to be by family. Well, I will just tell you, at that moment I could have ripped his head off! I tried not to "let him have it", though, instead recounting my litany of arguments & complaints inside my head: I carried you for nine months inside of me and let you beat me up until I literally had bruises... I changed all of your diapers and fed you in the middle of the night... Then, I watched you go off to your first day of school... I watched you head out on your first date... To graduation... And so many other things that have occurred over the years... But you want to go live by family?!?!? To say the least, I was absolutely crushed. Through all of this, though, God has showed me so much. You see, I have always been afraid of the day something would happen to my parents, or Tim, and I would be alone. I am just starting to establish a relationship with a stepsister, and that is so neat, but I have five half-brothers and sisters somewhere in the world; and I have no idea of anything about them. My real father wants nothing to do with me. I thank God everyday for a "daddy" who loves me, my stepfather. However, what God has showed me is that everything will be OK, not easy, but OK. I always thought of my grandchildren growing up within a few miles from me, so I could babysit whenever my kids needed. Or have them all over to swim and enjoy lunch together after church. Every decision we have made regarding our backyard was in preparation for the day we would have grandchildren. It maybe they only come for a week or two in the summer, or we go there, I have no idea, but in all of this God stopped me last Friday and asked why I was mad at Justin for wanting to move, as an adult, when he would only be 1000 miles away. I would have the opportunity to relatively easily drive or fly to visit him. But what about the girls' grandmother? He suggested that I should think about the fact that she would not have the same freedom & opportunity to visit the girls if she allowed them move 6000+ miles away. Getting in a car to drive here would not be an option; and she would have to make a very long plane trip in order to see them. Or we would have to go there, which we would be willing to do, if that is what it will take for her approval, but realistically how often can we do so? And at her age, she possibly may never see them again. The girls are her family. I can honestly say I would not like to be in her situation. I so hope and pray that God is molding her heart so she can see the increased opportunities the girls will have here versus in rural Russia. I don't want to be selfish in this in any way. My love has grown so much for them. I have come to not call the "grandmother" any longer. Instead, I am now calling her "grandma". As she will always be part of us now. In the mean time, as we have so far been unsuccessful locating her, my heart breaks for her. I truly hope she is OK. They have had so much illness over in Ukraine. It is so sad.

Will I ever be happy about my son moving so far away? NO, NO, NO, but I do understand. He is an adult; and he has to do what is best for himself. And maybe a fresh start will actually be good for him. So, I hope and pray he will have a blessed life. (And it would be really nice if he meets a girl from Mississippi up there in Minnesota. At least then we know they would come home for the holidays!!!!)

We are still waiting for our I-711H to come in, then we will be ready to send everything off for our SDA appointment. YEAH!!!

We did get an email last week that said the SDA is still keeping all appointments, but that due to all of the illness going around all orphanages, schools and universities will be closed for two to six weeks. They are hoping this will help stop some of the spread of the illness. The are having a real problem with the Swine Flu, so I suppose that may be what Alyona had. We are not sure if she is out of the hospital, or not, but I sure wish we knew. I also wish we would hear anything about Kristina. From the descriptions we've heard, the director at Kiliya is not very friendly. He supposedly does not like to have "his" kids adopted out. He wants to keep them there for himself. What kind of life is that for the kids?!?!

I want to leave you with something I found on another blog. It brought tears to my eyes. When God calls a women to be an adoptive parent... He places in her heart something special...

Being an adoptive mother is not for every woman. She must possess not only the natural mother instinct but an understanding and appreciation of the situation that brought a child into her arms making her a mother. The adoptive family came to be by choices made, choices made by the first parents and by the adoptive parents. This bond the adoptive mother has with her child grows over time, like the child did within his first mother’s womb. Day by day, touch by touch, with each tear, kiss, and memory made they became a family. Adoptive mothers have that special knack to let love grow.

Adoptive mothers know that she’s a mender of wounds, not just of the physical skinned knees with a band-aid and a kiss, but of the heart. She gives love, acceptance, and permission to ask and talk about the day he was born and of his first parents. Adoptive mothers are embracers, not only of the child with many hugs and kisses, but of the child’s heritage and history. She embraces the facts of her child’s past with strength for herself and the child.

She’s not only a memory maker planning family vacations, activities, and birthday parties, but also a memory keeper. Details of a birth, photos of the hospital, and of the parents who brought her into the world are kept along side the newspaper clipping that announced it all. All these things are kept in a special book that tells the whole story.

She’s a tier of shoelaces and of hearts. She weaves lives together into a tapestry of a new family, with many different brightly, colored threads showcasing their individualities and family origins. Together they create one unit attached to each other.

Adoptive mothers are experts at finding lost objects, but understand and validate the profound, deep loss left by adoption. She allows the tears to fall and grief to be felt, allowing the mourning of the mom not there. She is secure in knowing that she’s not a replacement, but a finisher of a race for someone who, for whatever reason, could not run any longer.

This role is not for the weak of spirit, or the easily wounded. Loving a child not born to her but calling her own, but this is what she does, it is her calling. She is a mother.

I know I can never replace the girls' mom, nor would I want to. I just want them to have a better life, but I need to know it is a better life they want also.

Lynn

Great Day Addendum - Uncomfortable, by Marty Stubblefield

“For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.” – 1 Corinthians 1:25 NIV

For the past four Sunday afternoons, my two older girls have been attending a basketball fundamentals clinic to help hone their skills and prepare for the upcoming season.

This Sunday, the girls focused primarily on ball handling drills with their left hand (that is, their off hand… or weak hand) and had to dribble with their left hand in most every drill.

It was fun to watch how the drilled slowed down for some of the girls while they focused intently on not losing the ball… on not looking at the ball… and keeping up with the others. Of course, some of the girls were better at it than others… But few were as adept with their left as they were with their right.

I remember hanging out and shooting hoops with my friend Tommy Simpson one summer day some 30 years ago and him sharing with me something that he had learned at a basketball camp somewhere.

“What you can do with your right hand...” and Tommy would dribble up and dunk with his right hand

“… You need to be able to do with your left.” and he dribbled up with his left hand and dunked with his left hand.

And we spent the rest of that hot summer afternoon dribbling right and then dribbling left… shooting right handed lay ups and then shooting left… shooting left handed hook shots along with hooks with our right…

“What you can do with your right hand… you need to be able to do with your left.

The uncomfortable should become the comfortable.

I wonder what that might look like now…. in our faith walk… with our family life… at work?

What if we allowed ourselves to become uncomfortable… allowed the Lord to make us uncomfortable?

Maybe that’s a wealthy man working with inner city kids.
Maybe that’s stepping out of the boat and starting a new, much needed ministry.
Maybe that’s a professional taking a break from corporate America and taking a mission trip to South Africa or Brazil.
Maybe that’s an introvert stepping up and teaching a class of 6th & 7th grade girls.
Maybe it’s sharing your faith with a friend who desperately needs to hear it.
Maybe that friend is a parent… or a sibling… or a spouse.

I don’t know what it may be for each of us… But I do know that it is time for us and our Laissez Faire attitude and lifestyle to step out of the status quo… step away from the easy and the comfortable… start going left when it is easier to go right.

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen”
– Ephesians 3:20-21 NIV

Keep the Faith… Carpe Diem
© Great Day Addendum Copyright 2009



After I had forwarded this devotional out to several people a friend wrote back the following comment: "Maybe it looks like a married couple who were getting ready to embrace the empty nest, feeling God's call to adopt 2 young girls!" I couldn't resist responding to her, "Y'all are adopting, too?!?!?! We didn't know."

:-)

So, how is the Lord possibly making you uncomfortable? Will you respond favorably to His promptings?

Tim

Well, after the fact of finding out that the girls do have family, and learning a bit more about the whole situation, I cannot say I am in any less shock. While I may be shocked, though, God is not. I always thought God never has a "plan B", but He does. It is for the times when us humans do not do what His will is for our lives. If we would all just seek Him on all things He would not need "plan B". What is our "plan B". At this point we don't have one. If God tells you, though, will you please pass it on to me?!?! I am trying to, "...be still and know He is Lord," in all of this.

I have spent a lot of time in the last week in the stillness of the Lord; and He has showed me and spoken some good truths into my life. There was a time three years ago when our youngest graduated from high school and went off to college. Wow! That was hard, but he still lived at home so I got to see him often. He let me make his dinner and get his lunches ready for him. I still shopped for him for clothes and most school supplies, and of course the cleaning up after him and doing his laundry. This past May he grew up and moved out. I knew the day would someday come, but I tell you I was not ready for it. He has grown into a fine young man. One any mom would be proud to call son. Of course he is still young and makes some mistakes, but we all do. And I am so happy every Saturday or Sunday when he brings home his laundry and I still get the chance to do something for him. I know someday this too will pass. But, for now, I enjoy getting to do something for him. He was so cute this past weekend when he was home. He asked me to cut his hair, which I have done since he was a baby. He did say he would like it shorter than I have been cutting it. He even showed me the picture of the way he wanted. But you see, he had no idea I was intentionally cutting it longer and longer so he would need it cut more often so I had that few minutes of him by myself. It was a time Dad would be off doing something else; and him and I could just talk. I had his undivided attention as there was no way he would leave in the middle of a haircut. Well, he must have caught on! But since May, or I guess since graduation three and a half years ago, I have not felt like I have had any real purpose on this earth. Yes, I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a best friend, a deacon's wife, a church goer, and a First Place leader, but I never felt I had a real "God purpose". When I saw the girls picture for the first time, though, I felt God say, "You still do have a purpose in life. I am not done with you. I want you to be a mom to two girls who so deeply need a mom in their life." His plan was not for them to grow up in there in separate orphanages. So I had a joy in my heart which I had not had since the day I sat and watched my baby (young man) graduate. I have said since the beginning I am not sure if these are are girls or if we just got their picture to open our minds and hearts to orphans. I do not feel God is done with us. Last week Tim had been out of town for work, so when he came home Friday night we went to dinner and while talking he mentioned that he was not sure if God is telling him we are to get two other girls or not. I am confused by that as we have said to people we are to be the "father to the fatherless". How then can he say what he did? But at the beginning of this I also said I was going to be a submissive wife. I never knew how hard that can be. We have lots of things to overcome, "...but with God all things are possible." Every time I think we should not do something I get one of those NCIS Gibbs & DiNozzo moments where Gibbs hits DiNozzo in the back of the head. Not hard. Just enough to get his attention. God needs to get mine a lot as my mind is always off and going.

I was reading a commentary the other day and there were a few good points I would like to share with you:

1.) Why do some people experience the same trauma, loss and suffering as others, but never give up? In fact, they grow from their experiences and go on to accomplish amazing things - even help others who are suffering.
2.) We can believe that we always have a choice: to give in and live as a victim to the pain and suffering of life on this planet, or choose to live in His VICTORY and STRENGTH. (I confess that I am not often up to such a positive choice. Without Him reaching down to lift me up I could not even choose to seek Him. Thankfully He does reach down; and that knowledge of truth fills my heart with an overflow of joy.)


"Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34)", but we need to, "consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is going to be revealed to us (Romans 8:18)"; and we need to REJOICE in the Lord for He is good and merciful.


Our pastor spoke about Esther, this past Sunday night in church. I learned several things I never knew before, or if I had known I had forgotten:

1.) Esther was an orphan. She was taken in and raised by Mordecai.
2.) She was beautiful. She was placed in the care of Hegai who was in charge of all the women. She pleased him and found favor with him.
3.) Esther went before the king in the tenth month, the seventh year of his reign.
4.) The king loved Esther more than all the women, so he set the royal crown on her head and made her queen instead of Vashti.
5.) As Mordecai commanded her, Esther had not made it know who her people were yet.
6.) Haman was upset that Mordecai would not bow down to him or pay homage to him.
7.) The king gave Haman the signet ring so he could do the king's business.
8.) Haman set out to have all the Jews killed.
9.) When Mordecai found out what happened he tore his clothes and put on sack cloth and ashes and went out and wailed loudly.
10.) When Esther heard of what had happened with Mordecai she sent him clothes in hopes he would put them on, but he would not accept them.
11.) Mordecai told Esther to stay quiet so she will not have harm come to her or her father's house.
12.) She had Mordecai assemble all the Jews to pray and fast for three days and nights; and Esther and her maidens did the same.
13.) On the third day Esther put on her royal robes and stood in the inner court. The king saw her and extended the golden scepter; and she went into him.
14.) He saw she was bothered and asked what request he could do for her. She invited he & Haman to a banquet she had prepared for them.
15.) Haman was upset that Mordecai would not bow down to him so he sent for his friends. They came up with a plan to hang Mordecai.
16.) The king learned of Haman's plan to kill Mordecai and put a stop to it. Instead, he had Haman place one of the king's robes on Mordecai and put him upon a horse and parade him through the city's square.
17.) Esther told the king about her and her people being sold as slaves. The king wanted to know who would do this; and she proclaimed it to be Haman.
18.) The king had Haman hung on the gallows which had been prepared for Mordecai.
19.) The king then gave Mordecai the signet ring.
20.) Esther fell at the kings feet and wept and asked for the Jews lives to be spared. The king agreed to do what was right.

Esther made her plans carefully. She asked the Jews to fast and pray with her before she went to the king. It seemed fitting that the day on which the Jews were to be killed their enemies died.

Strengths and accomplishments:
- Her beauty and character won the heart of Persia's King
- She combined courage with careful planning
- She was open to advice and willing to act
- She saw her God given opportunity; and she seized it
- She was more concerned for others than for her own security

We should pray as if all depends on GOD and act as if all depends on us. Yet, we should avoid both extremes of doing nothing and feeling we must do everything.

Potters Hand, by Hillsong

Beautiful Lord, wonderful Saviour
I know for sure, all of my days are held in Your hands
Crafted into Your perfect plan

You gentle call me, into Your presence
Guiding me by, Your Holy Spirit
Teach me dear Lord
To live all of my life through Your eyes

I'm captured by, Your Holy calling
Set me apart
I know You're drawing me to Yourself
lead me Lord I pray

Take me, mold me
use me, Fill me
I give my life to the potters hands
Hold me, guide me
Lead me, Walk beside me
I give my life to the potters hand

I am asking you to all please be in prayer for the girls' grandmother... that her heart will become like clay which Jesus can mold and make new... that she has a peace that everything will be okay for her and great for the girls to come and live with us. We so want to be their forever family.

Lynn

It has been a rough few days around here. Last Thursday Tim got a call from the friend of a friend over in Ukraine. We had spoke to him about making a trip to visit each of the girls for us for a small fee. Well, on Thursday he had traveled to Balta to see Alyona and had spent some time with her. He gave her the letters we had emailed him, as we were not sure she had received the ones we had previously mailed. He helped her write a short note back to us. He was also able to get some new photos for us. Wow, it was so good to see how she was, and to hear all about her! He called Tim that afternoon to let him know about the visit, and to let us know that he was able to find out when her birthday is. Yeah! It is two days before my mom's; and Kristina's birthday is two weeks after my dad's. He also dropped a bombshell on us. I guess we needed to know before we get to Ukraine, so we are prepared, but I will just tell you, I am not over it yet. We thought the girls had no family. Well, we were wrong. There is a grandma who lives in Russia and an uncle who lives in Ukraine. We believe her to be older in age, but are not sure of much at this point.

I walked around most of Friday with a numb feeling. After losing two babies, many years ago via miscarriage, it was like going through that all over again. I had promised myself I would not get so emotionally attached to these girls that I could not walk away if I had to. But at this point I am not sure how I would do that. My heart is split in two. I so badly want these girls to be ours, but how would I feel if I was the grandmother? Could I give them up without a fight? Would they think I don't care about them? Would they understand I only want what is best for them? What is the best for them? They have lost so much at this point. I don't want them to suffer any more.

We talked with our friend in Odessa for almost two hours on Saturday; and he offered us good advice. Also, he planned to go to Kiliya to see Kristina this week. I asked him about possibly sending a letter to the grandmother that I had written on Friday. He did not think that would be a good idea.

When I arrived home today I was surprised to find a letter in the mail addressed in Russian. I thought at first that it was from one of the girls, maybe Kristina. Of course I could not tell right away as I do not speak or read Russian!! (Note to self: I need to work on that... in my spare time. Between 1:00am and 4:00am is the only spare time I am aware of, but who needs sleep, right? It's overrated!) So, this evening I ran over to our friends, the Tygarts, and had Josh read it for me. (He is such a great kid. I can not say enough good stuff about him. = ) ) Well, come to find out the letter is not from the girls at all. It is from the grandmother! She has seen my letter to Alyona, and does not like the idea of me writing to her granddaughter, and in no uncertain terms am I to write to her again. She even went on to say that I must send the girl's pictures back to her. She sounded very unhappy in her letter. Part of me wants to fight this "to the death". Then part says, "They are not yours to fight for." But I heard this week from a wise preacher, if God is working, so is Satan. We have seen God working all over this thing, from the beginning up until now. So I guess it is up to God. When He is done He will show me to move on. I know we will have two girls come to live with us. Will it be these two girls? I do not know. Only God knows. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD. They are plans for peace and not disaster, plans to give you a future filled with hope (Jeremiah 29:11 Gods Word).

The thing God keeps impressing on me tonight is the story in 1 Kings 3 regarding the two mothers who are fighting over a baby. They went before King Solomon and he says to bring a sword to divide the child in half in order to let each woman have half. At that point the real mother steps up and says, no, let the other woman have the child. Just let the child live. I, too, would have to be that woman.

Please be praying for us. We are still working to collect the rest of the funds necessary so that if we should need to leave right away, we can. I will stay over there as long as required and will be without an income for that time. God is faithful, though. He will provide.

Lynn

It has been another busy few weeks. I see why people say it should take six to eight months to adopt. And we are working to accomplish it in about four. We did not want to do a marathon. We went for a long sprint. Too bad this was not also a weight loss journey! I do believe I may have put on a few pounds, but I guess it is like having twins. LOL!

We had a mishap with our state clearance paperwork. When I first went and turned in the request I gave them the paperwork all signed. At least most of it, anyway. Tim's was done. Mine never got witnessed so it was sent back. I got that done, turned it back in, received them back. We thought we were done. We emailed it over to Ukraine to make sure it was what we needed, but we were informed it was not. The state had performed a "name only" check. We actually needed a fingerprint check. So, I went and picked up more finger print cards. We went to the Jackson Police Department to get our finger prints taken, again. I was not sure I would ever get all the ink off my skin! I went and turned them in, again. The nice lady there mailed them back to me. About a week later I still had not yet received them so I made a trip back out to her office. Of course she wasn't in, but she called me back to tell me she had mailed them just the day before; and we should receive them in a few days. OK, that is on a Thursday. She calls me on Monday morning and asks if I had gotten them over the weekend. No, they had not made it, but maybe they would there that day I say. She, oh so nicely, says, "I am not sure that is going to happen." "What do you mean" I ask. Well, somehow there had been a mishap in her office; and our paperwork was sent to Canada!! She had come in to work to a phone call from a lady in the Immigration Office wanting to know who we were and what she needed to do with our paperwork? She did send it back to us overnight, at no cost to us. I was glad for that as we had nothing to do with it, but in all of this they come to find out my fingerprints had not printed well enough. I had to fingerprint myself as the officer was sick and in a bad mood so he did not feel like touching me and possibly getting me sick. Once more with the ink, but praise the LORD, we are done.

As part of the home study process we had to take ten hours of classes on how to be a parent. I guess already raising two kids did not teach us anything. The classes were scheduled the same weekend we were going to be of town. Yes, my sweet husband took me to the beach for my birthday. After doing a little homework, though, we found out we could take the classes on line. So you know me, I was able to teach Catholic Charities something! They had not known classes were available that way. Online classes actually saved us some money, too; and we got to pick the classes that were more geared to the girls, than babies. We also decided to take an extra 2.5 hours because we saw another class we thought would be helpful.

On the way to the beach we received a call from Mrs. Betti. She had been to the office, dropped off her signed copy of the home study, and was hoping her boss would read it yet that week. Well, that did not happen. The boss did finally read it and approved several changes she needed us to make by the following Thursday. So Mrs. Betti called and left me a message, at home of all places, late on Thursday afternoon. She said I could go on Friday morning to pick up the home study so we would have the weekend to review it and make sure everything in it was correct. Then she said we would I would need to bring $500 for the rest of the home study and $200 for the liaison fees (Tim and I both went, What liaison fees?' but when we looked there it was in black and white. They just had not previously explained the fee to us). Well, I told someone at class, on Thursday night, that it seemed weird anytime I needed to write a check for an adoption expense God had just "dropped" the money into our lap. We really have not had to take anything from our own accounts up to now. Between extra cleaning jobs, to income tax money, to multiple gifts, He has always supplied, but this time it looked like we were just going to use some money from our adoption account. It didn't appear there would be a WOW moment, but it is God is GOD, right? On Friday I went to my first cleaning job. They ask how things are going with the girls; and I tell them. They are not really ready for me to clean right then, as I was a little early that morning, so I ran and cleaned another house real quick, then came back. When I got there. She had left a card. I thought maybe it was for my birthday so I had not thought much about it. I cleaned there house, then left. As I was heading into the bank to go withdraw the cash to pay for the home study I opened the card. Well, GOD did it to me again. It was nothing for me, but for the girls it was the $250 we were "short". I stood at the bank door thanking God!!! I know the people at the bank had to have thought I had lost my mind. I mean I was standing there just talking out loud in the lobby, thanking Him! I then turned around and left the bank. I no longer needed to withdraw any money, as I now had all I needed! I drove to Jackson thinking, "Hear I come, home study!" I get there, and no one is in the office. So, I head over to Tim's office to call. No answer. I call Mrs. Betti. She gives me the direct line, instead of the switchboard. I leave a message. Still no call back. I go back over to their office. Still no one. I call Mrs. Betti again. She has me come by her house and drop off the money, then call the emergency contact number to see if someone can possibly email us a copy. No one ever called me back. I am so glad it was not an actual emergency! We did not get the home study until the following Monday; and there were several mistakes. We got them fixed, then emailed a copy to Ukraine, where they discovered one other minor statement to change. After another week we now have a completed home study. YEAH! PRAISE the LORD! He is so good...

The home study has now supposedly been sent off to Citizenship & Immigration Services for the final stop in the U.S. side of the paper work. We have had some more money come in through donations; and we would like to thank everyone who is praying for us and donating to us. We could not do this on our own. It is the love and support of all of you that helps keep us going.

It is sad to see all the darkness in the world today. I was telling Tim the other day, the system would work faster and better if all of the people who worked in places of ministry, like Catholic Charities, would go and do mission work at least every other year, if not every year. Their hearts desire would be to work faster and harder to find these children a home... A family who would love them and support them. We are to show them mercy and grace. There have been times I have wanted to say, "If the girls are not here by Christmas, like God said they would be, it was the your (the administrators) fault. I have done all I can do. You dragged your feet. You are the reason the girls have to spend another Christmas in a place with no family and no love. How would you like it if we put you there and did that to you? I am pretty sure you would not"

My heart is so heavy for the 143 million orphans of the world. I can only help two of them, but I can pray for many. Please be in prayer for them, also. November 8, 2009 is Orphan Sunday. If only 7% of all Christians would adopt a child there would be no more children in orphanages. That seems mind boggling to me. When you think 7% that is really not that many. I am not saying adoption is for everyone, but I am saying to please be in prayer about it. If it is not right for you, then maybe you can help a family you know by assisting them as they help a child.

Until next time, please continue to pray for us...

Lynn

I am so sorry I have been so long in getting another post up. I am not even sure where all the time seems to go. I get up in the mornings, do my thing, and before I know it, it is time to go to bed.

Both of our doctor appointments went fine. He said we are both healthy and should live long lives. He was proud of how much weight I had lost since the last time I was in, so that is a real good thing. The less weight to carry around, the better to keep up with 2 girls. I say that, then I let Satan whisper in my ear that I am too old for this. That I won't be a good mother. That I won't be able to keep up. Or his best one is, "How can you relate to them with the age difference?" But then God comes in and YELLS in my ear, "Who is in control? You will be fine. I would not have called you if I did not trust you, or know you could handle it." I know He never gives us more than we can handle, so God will have HIS victory in this! There is a song that says, "Satan, get under my feet." That is right where my Jesus wants him to be, under my feet.

We have made lots of progress. We went for our biometrics (finger prints), and collected the rest of the home study paperwork. Mrs. Betti has finished writing it. She is now waiting for her supervisor to read it so she can turn it over for our review to see if we have anything we want to add. All off the local, state, and federal clearances are done, so we are waiting for immigration services to approve us to send our dossiers over to Ukraine. We received an email from a friend on Friday who gave us the email address of a man who was going to Balta this weekend and there was a chance he might get to visit with Alyona while he was there. Tim sent the man an email and very shortly there afterward got a phone call from the man, via Skype (which is way cool); and he was more than willing to visit with her for us. So we quickly wrote another letter to her and emailed it along with some pictures of the family so she had some idea of who these strange people in the USA were that were writing to her. He was hoping to help her write us a letter and take a small video of her for us. This is almost like sending your child off to camp summer and not hearing from them. Tim asked him if he ever goes to Kiliya. He said he would for a price; and it would fit into our budget, so we will see if he will go there for us in a couple of weeks. YEAH!!!

It is the funnest thing. I have had a sick stomach for the past several weeks, almost like morning sickness. I know it is just nerves, but the other day there was a thing on the news about a man and his wife in Florida who were a host family to three sisters. When it was time to send the girls home, they did not. Instead they filed for temporary custody, and got it. Ukraine then threatened to stop all host programs and international adoptions until the girls were returned. I felt as if a rug had been pulled out from under me. I may not have a baby growing inside of my stomach, but I do have two girls growing inside of my heart. I think God uses this time of preparations and going through all of this process to develop our love for the children. I had never knew one could learn to love someone so deeply as I have by just looking at a dozen photos of them. Never even getting a letter from them, but just their smiles and eyes tell so much.

Tim has been teaching our Sunday School class the last couple Sundays and teaching on obedience. He has taught me a lot about my faith, that I have been trying to make it work, figuring out how God wants it all to come together, but if I just read the Word every day it tells me what to do. We are to help the widows and the orphans. Sometimes that means taking the hand of a widow and helping them across the street. Or, maybe it is calling on a "shut in" to see if they possibly need something from the store. It might mean taking a fatherless boy to the park to play ball. Or if could be teaching a motherless girl how to properly apply makeup. Basically, just being a strong Christian witness to those less fortunate.

I will finish up on a funny note for y'all. Pulling into church this morning, I noticed several empty handicap parking spaces. I looked at Tim and said, "Before both girls are grown & gone we may need one of those spots closer to the door than the off campus parking we normally go to. See, we usually park in a different lot, down the street, then ride the shuttle. After I got inside church and thought a little more about that I realized the joke is really on them! They still have to walk from the parking lot into the building, maybe as much as a few hundred feet. On the other hand, the shuttle picks us up at our vehicle, and drops us off at any of the doors we choose. We might have to walk all of 25 feet to get in the building, so those people parking in handicap spaces really end up walking further than we do. Funny, huh?

Until next time... please keep praying for us!

Lynn

Wow! What a whirlwind of a day. I started out at the gym. Then, off to work. I cleaned two houses by 11:45 am. At that point I needed to go take a nap, but that was not to be in my schedule today. I had to meet Tim to get his name on a piece of paper so I could get it in the mail yet today. Tim had his doctor appointment this morning. It seemed to go good, except they forgot to do the TB test. So, now he has to go back tomorrow.

Anyway, from there I had to go to the church to pick up a letter for the social worker. I then made a couple of phone calls to find out why some other documents had not arrived yet. Next, to the post office, then the Mississippi Department of Safety to file a request for a background check. And on to the County Appraiser's office to get the certified copy of the square footage statement for our house. While I was there, I decided to go ahead and pay for Tim's truck tags. I was speaking to a lady in line about the adoption; and she was happy for us. After she left, the man ahead of me stepped up to pay; and he asked me to join him at the window. He wanted to know how much my tags were. I told him, "$27.00;" and he asked the lady to add it to his bill. Then, he said for me to apply the money I saved to the adoption. WOW!! My God is sooooo good!

I also had my doctor appointment this afternoon. It went well; and they remembered my TB test! We both go back in on Friday morning to have them read. Mrs. Betti called me this afternoon to tell me she was afraid we might have a serious problem with our FBI check. When we sent off for the background check we wrote a November 1st deadline on the outside of the envelope. She said we should have written "Return in 2 weeks". She went on to say that as a result it be might be 10 weeks before we receive the response back, so she gave me a number to call to check. Oh, lucky me. The menu prompts had changed. I was stunned when I actually got a live person on the other end, who then told me the background checks were complete; and the responses were to be mailed TOMORROW! Praise the Lord!! Once more our angels are watching out for us.

By the way... I did get home in time to lay down for a short nap. The operative word is "short" because the phone rang FIVE times. In other words, STILL NO NAP. Some day, maybe, but as for now it is worth not getting one if it helps to get the girls home as soon as we can. And if that means no nap for a while, so be it!

Lynn

Another busy week. I don't know where the time goes. My grandma use to say, "The older you get, the faster it goes." Boy, was she was right. She passed away at the age of 93; and I will tell you, she must have been on roller coaster ride the last 45 years of her life, and hanging on for dear life! I feel like I live on one now. I take a deep breath in the morning; and off I go, up, up, up... then down we gooooo... and around... hang onnnn!!

The other morning Tim and I were at the altar; and I prayed that I would ask God to show me how to make my to do list each day. Not doing it the way 'I' think it should be done, but 'His' way. I mean, I know there are the things I have to do, like go to work, go to gym, do Bible study... I'm one who likes to write everything down just so I can mark it off. I even write things down after I do them just to mark them off! (I know. I am a sick person!) It's a mind game I play that makes me feel like I got more done. But I want to learn to do the things that God wants me to do. How many times have I possibly not been where I needed to be because I put my SELF in the way? I want to have GOD in the way. I might have missed the Office Depot moment, a few weeks ago, if I had not listened to the little voice inside of me saying, "Go to Office Depot, now." I want, so badly, to hear, AND FOLLOW, God's voice every time he talks to me. Whether it's in a still, small whisper, or even a loud, yelling voice. LOL!!

Last Saturday we received our appointment notice to go to the FBI, on Sept. 4, for our "biometrics to be captured" (in other words our fingerprints to be done!). For some reason, that seems scary to me. I guess it's because of the words FBI, or Homeland Security. It's not like I am a criminal. By the way, I can't believe how many times we have to be fingerprinted! Anyway, then Monday Mrs. Betti called and we scheduled our last home study interview with her and that one was at our house. I think it all went well. I guess we will know when we get to read her report. We had to go a couple of times this week to get papers notarized so we could get them FedEx'd out on Friday. Along with them we needed Apostilles. So, that meant a trip to downtown Jackson. Not a big deal, but the first set were wrong, so off we go again! Thankfully we got them right the second time. Lots of other paperwork for Ukraine dossier is starting to get done. I am still shocked at the amount of all of it.

Friday was Tim's birthday. He is now 47; and, yes, he is glad he is going to be a daddy to 2 girls! I think when you get older you can enjoy things more. We were very young when we had our boys. I was 19 with Justin and 25 with Christopher. I am glad I was a young mom to give birth, but I think I will be a wise mom now. I will have learned from many of my mistakes. Yes, I do know girls are different than boys, but love is the same, no matter what. It will not always be easy, but it will definitely be worth it!

I went to the mall to look for a gift for Tim for his birthday. I looked around, but could not really find anything he "needed", or wanted. Maybe it was me not wanting to spend the money! So, I went home and took a cat nap before heading out to take some photographs of the boys. Tim had asked for some new shots of them for his office. I got dressed, so that I would be ready to go out for dinner afterward. I had to swing by FedEx to ship some papers. Well, let me just tell you, I hope my envelope gets a great meal on the plane going over for what it cost to ship SIX pieces of paper!! I thought the poor young man behind the counter was going to faint when he told me the price. I thought Tim might have to bury me. $128.10 to mail them!!!! Then young man did go on to say they would be arrive on Sept. 2nd. Great! I would hope so. And in a limousine for that price!! He did say I could lower that price by $10.00, but doing so would add 15 days to the arrival date. He let out a huge laugh; and the lady behind the wall came to see what was going on. She re-checked the price; and she was speechless, too. That must be why Tim didn't need a present! The money went to pay for Fed Ex. So, in his card, I gave him the receipt!!

I received an email from a friend this week. In it she talked about a little boy who came to the orphanage at a young age. He waited for a family to come for him; and he waited; and he waited; and he waited some more, but no one ever came. She visited him when she could; and she always saw sadness in his eyes. I guess he knew somewhere in his heart he might never get a family. As the kids grow older the less likely it is for them to be picked by a family. At the age of 14, in the 9th grade, he aged out of the system. No one ever did come for he or his younger brother. (Note: Even more sadly, the way the Ukrainian system is set-up, once an older sibling ages out, younger siblings are no longer eligible for adoption, either.) Now at the age of 19, he still struggles everyday with the thought that they will never have a forever family. I know we have so many kids here in the USA who need homes, but one thing that is significantly different is we do not put our kids out on the street at the age of 14 years old, to fend for themselves. They get to stay in a home until the age of 18; and if most of the kids would act nice to their foster parents they would probably even get to stay longer. So many of our youth today feel we owe them "the world", though; and we don't. I know not all foster parents are nice, but much really has to do with the kids. There is always 3 sides to everything yours, mine and God's. And God's is the only one that counts. Again, I cannot tell you why Ukraine? Or even why us? But when God calls it is always better to answer in the affirmative. Sorry, enough of that soap box...

I think I have run myself silly this week! I had to go to the Appraiser's office to get the certified square footage for our house. Before I could send off to get our certified marriage certificate we had to browse to the Orange County, CA, website, download their form, have it notarized, get a money order, then finally mail it. Well, I was running late today; and thank God I was! Late this morning Tim learned we needed FOUR copies, not just two. If we hadn't found that out when we did we would have had to redo all of it and have spent even more money on shipping. Also this week, I have spent time on the phone calling to get Tim in to a doctor for a complete exam. As he never gets sick, he never goes to the doctor. Normally that would be good, but when you specifically need quick access to a family doctor, it definitely is not. Also, this week, I have went to the Highway Patrol office to get paperwork for Mississippi state background checks. On Tuesday, I had to go to the foot doctor because I have hurt my feet. Praise the Lord, I have lost 100 pounds, but in doing so I have walked my feet to death, or at least my feet think so! The doctor restricted me from exercise walking for 30 days. Only water class, exercise bike, and elliptical trainer. At least he didn't put me on bed rest, but then again, that might be nice! That would create its own set of problems, though. How would all of this get done? Back on the doctor topic... I found an old doctor of mine who was willing to squeeze in both Tim and I on Wednesday for medical exams. Yeah! One more item to mark off the list. Friday... FBI.

Lynn

I hope y'all's last few weeks have been good. Mine have! Two weekends ago, Tim & I went canoeing with the Tygarts. It was Josh's first time. He had not previously done anything like that. I think he really enjoyed himself, though, some of the time he seemed a little bored. The water was not as high as in the past which makes for more work. He had started in a canoe with Anthony; and they seemed to be OK, but after a while Anthony became frustrated because Josh was not picking up on it as quick as Moises had when we took him. But Moisés spoke better English so caught on a little easier. After we had stopped to eat we moved Josh into Tim's canoe; and that worked good. They had a good time together; and Anthony and Mark had a blast. We did the "long run" of the river... All 13 miles. With the water down we had to work really hard. I think it clearly showed some of us that we are not as young as we used to be!! Oh well. The exercise was good; and the fellowship was GREAT! After the day on the river we went to Jerry's for catfish dinner. Josh loves fish so we thought that would be a good place to end the day.

I can't believe school has been going for two weeks already. I so wish Kristina and Alyona were here. I am concerned about how far behind they may be in their studies. Getting them into a school over here as young as possible will help us get the most help from the school district. I just don't want them to feel as though they spend all day in school, then come home to hours & hours of homework. I want them to embrace the idea of learning all they can learn, but not be overwhelmed by it.

This has been a hard week for me. To think, my youngest is now a junior in college. And he was so nice to point out to me the other day that if I thought I was old now just wait until the girls were graduating from college! I was shocked he would say that. I mean I guess he thinks sixty will be old. Well, come to think of it, I won't be a spring chicken! LOL!

We have made lots of progress with the adoption this last couple weeks. We have completed everything the case worker needed us to do: Finger prints, shots for cats, fire extinguishers, all new batteries in the smoke detectors, wire transfer for interpreter, and the passports arrived in the mail. That was a big praise, as we can now petition the Ukrainian government to confirm both girls are eligible for adoption. We needed the passport numbers to be able to initiate that process. Our case worker is hoping that all of the questionnaires from our references will arrive Monday so she can come to our house on Tuesday or Wednesday to finish up her side of the home study. The last thing we will need to do for her then is a 10-hour parenting class.

Wow! I stand amazed at how God can bring things together so quickly. So far, whenever we have needed to write a check to pay for something the money has been there. Praise the Lord! This week one of our income tax checks came in. We filed late this year; and normally this would be something to frown upon, but I guess I can't complain too much this time. If we had filed on time, then we would have spent the money by now. Instead, now, one day before we had to process the wire transfer, we received that amount plus a little extra in the mail!

My mom surprised me the other day. She said her and my dad had been talking; and if for some reason Tim had to come home from Ukraine early, and Christopher was still in school, she would be more than willing to fly over, so that I would not be alone. That shocked me. She has never been very adventurous, and that she would be willing to go half way around the world was cool. So, we will see how God wants to work it all out. I have had an aunt and uncle from southern Illinois visiting for the last few days; and that has been neat. I look forward to taking the girls up there to meet some of their new extended family, once they get here and have settled into the new surroundings. I hope when they come they have some pictures of their parents. They were so young when they lost their mom and dad. I want them to be able to remember all they can of them. It is their past, and an important part of them.

Lynn

A lot has happened this week. Some good, and some not so good.

I will start back on Monday, the 3rd. I got up that morning with a full "to do" list. It was a good thing I didn't have to work that day as I barely had time to breath.

I just don't know how women who have full time jobs "do it all". My hat is off to y'all, that's all I can say!! God has to have blessed you with some great angels to help you get it all done.

I had not slept well Sunday night. I guess it was about 3:30 A.M. before I really feel asleep, so when the alarm went off at 4:45... Well, I guess was glad I had not thrown it out the window as it was only doing it's job! After all, it was just an innocent bystander. Anyway, at that point I decided to go back to sleep until my sweet husband's alarm went off. Then, I intended to ask him to follow me to Walmart so I could drop off my car for an oil change, and then have him take me to the gym. I figured I could then walk back to Walmart, or catch a ride, to pick up my car. It seemed like a good idea to me. I figured it would only take him 10 minutes; and it would help me out. If not, I would fit the gym in somewhere else in my day. Well, his response was something to the effect of why had I not asked him this prior to the morning. Of course, my comment to that was, "Because I didn't think he wanted me to wake him at 3:30 A.M. to tell him. Then I would have been wide awake again; and so would have he. Well, I could tell by the "man tone" in his voice, he did not care too much for my idea. (Sorry men, but you know y'all have "that" tone, just like us women have one, too.) So, anyway, I said not to worry. I would take care of it on my own. I headed off to Walmart and told the man who checked me in that I needed an oil change and my tires rotated. That seems like a pretty simple request, right? An hour and a half later they call my name. Now, while I am there, I was multitasking by also doing my grocery shopping (of course I have frozen food, too). I get up to the counter to pay and discover they had not rotated my tires. I will just tell you now, it was NOT easy to let Jesus shine through at that moment because the last three times they have done the exact same thing. Then, to make matters worse, they tell me I have wait for the three cars IN FRONT OF ME. This after I had arrived before 7:00 A.M., and had helped the man set out the display tires, so he could check me in. At that I asked to speak to the manager. Thankfully, the manager knows me and gets them to finish my vehicle right away. Praise the Lord!! I will just say it again, Praise the Lord!! After that, I ran to Office Depot to make a few copies. They open at 8:00, and it is now 9:00, so they should be ready for customers, right? WRONG!! Or so I thought... You see, what Satan tried to do that morning was get me mad, and not let me be the witness I needed to be, but God is so good! I went in the store; and out of FIVE copiers, NOT EVEN ONE OF THEM WAS WORKING!! Can you just believe my luck?? At that point I kind of felt like I just needed to go home and back to bed! But with so many things to get done, not a chance. I walked up to the counter and asked the man to help me. He looked at my originals and said he couldn't copy the page from the magazine. I said, "Well, I am Lynn Loecher. Here is my license to prove who I am. I helped co-author the article, so I am giving myself permission to copy it." It was from a church newsletter, FROM EIGHT YEARS AGO. I just did not want to go to the church to copy a single page. I proceeded to tell him the article was about my husband having an affair, and how God had restored our marriage. I continued that the rest of the story was we are still together and are now adopting 2 girls. He asked if he could read it. I told him I was in a hurry, but that he could make an extra copy and I would happily pay for it. He did so; and I left. The rest of my day went reasonably well, but I never did make it to the gym. I know from past experience that if I don't get there by 5:30 in the morning I just don't get there at all. Oh well, maybe next time...

I did make it to the gym on Tuesday. Go girl!! I even walked 4 miles in 57 minutes, which is good for me. I had to work that day; and afterwards had a long list of things to do. One item was to run by Walmart. While in the store, I "ran into" the man from Office Depot; and he me told how much he enjoyed reading our article. He also shared that he and his wife were separated, as he had had an affair; but that she wanted to work it out. He said they were going to dinner together on Friday night. He then told me he did not know why he was in the store on Monday morning as he was not supposed to work that day, but he had gotten his days goofed up and came in on his day off day. The guy who was to supposed work that morning never showed up; and that's why the copiers had not been turned on yet when I arrived. Anyway, the man said he was sorry again; and I apologized for my poor attitude. I told him I felt it was a "total God thing" as God knew I was going into that store; and he needed to be reminded that if he would put God back in the center of his life things would work out. If my Monday had started the way I intended I would have missed a divine appointment to be a witness for Jesus. At the end of the day, when I laid my head down, I was still able to say, " I got it all done, and I will get up and do it all over again tomorrow."

Wednesday was another busy work day, then church. It was a great service, but it always is if you are there to worship Him who gives you life. It was not one of my better moments at home later that night, though. Over the weekend Tim and I had a conversation. He said it was Saturday. I thought it was Sunday. That's not important, though, but he thought we had decided one thing. I didn't know we made any decisions about it. Basically, he had said he wanted to re-join choir; and I said if he wanted, then he should, but we needed to figure out how to fit it in on our busy, busy schedule. I thought that meant we would sit down and talk about it some more. He thought that meant between him and the choir director, I guess. (Just kidding.) When church got over, he said, "I will see you at home after choir practice." Well, that went over like a lead balloon! As you're probably already guessing, "Not so great!" By the time he got home I was fit to be tied; and I laid into him as if he had just committed a crime. I was HUNGRY. You see, we had been going to Subway for dinner immediately following church the last several weeks so I had not eaten. Not a good thing: hungry, tired woman, still not over the Walmart episode from Monday morning, still holding a grudge about the gym, and then this miscommunication. Well, when he got home... look out. He clearly know I was mad. Real MAD. Thankfully by bed time I peaceably said good night, and gave him a kiss, and said I loved him, and we would figure it out somehow.

Then Thursday, and the StairMaster at the gym. -- I want every one to know that machine was invented by Satan himself as a sick joke. 39 flights of stairs in 12 minutes, to burn all of 57 calories!! Then 4 hours later I could hardly move my legs to get in and out of the car. Sorry, my A.D.D. kicked in. -- A song by John Waller comes on my MP3 player:

WHILE I'M WAITING

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on you, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
taking every step in obedience

While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on you, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on you, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

The lesson I have learned this week is that when things don't go the way we desire, or people don't do what we want, it is OK. We are waiting on the Lord; and in that time we are to serve Him and worship Him. I am so glad I have a husband who is so in tune with the things the Lord wants him to do. Well most things! I want to be the woman God intends me to be.

I am learning it is OK to say that small 2-letter word Tim has tried so hard for so many years to get me to say, "No." He would say, "Let's practice before you leave. When someone asks you to do something, can you say, "No." No, I can't say, "No." Well, this past week in my quiet time with the Lord, He showed me that I needed to step down from co-teaching a weight loss class at our church and become a student for a while. To sit, and be still, and know He is God. To let Him be in control of my life. So, when the lady I teach with called me and asked if I was coming back, I told her, "No." I could hear the angels in heaven clapping and cheering me on for being obedient to the Lord; and it felt good, too! That's very hard for me, but if I don't seek HIM I will miss the lessons He needs to teach me. As well, He told me we are on a tight time table. He wants the girls home for Christmas. So we cannot miss a step, or we could miss a deadline and possibly not get them here. How would I feel if it was because of something I did that they would not be together for Jesus' birthday? I don't even know what they know about Him, but I feel an urgency to get them here to pour out His love for them.

Sorry this was so long. I hope not all weeks are this busy, but in the long run it was a GREAT week. Please be in prayer for the man from Office Depot and his wife. And if any of you have any prayer requests, please feel free to send them to either of us. We would love to pray with you, or for, you.

I hope you all have a blessed and wonderful weekend with Jesus!

Lynn